I don't know when it happened...whether between the endless poopy messes, spilled water, screaming about which color cup should temporarily hold said water, or what color socks can be worn on Tuesday that were not okay on Monday, and which shoes to wear with which socks, no you may not wear flip flops in January!
But somewhere inbetween the tantrums and tears, bruises and scrapes, messes and oopsies, I lost who I was. Maybe some moms don't, but I did. I forgot who I was and I became Mommy Robot.
This year has been a year of rediscovering who I am and who I want to be, with the help of my God and Savior. My husband has been so supportive and has encouraged me. I am still trying to complete the transition back from just Mommy to Woman, but I am making progress.
I returned to teaching at a college-style school where I teach part-time. My students are in grades two through twelve. Yes, quite a spread. :-) My eldest attends kindergarten there, and my youngest is in childcare there as well. It couldn't be more perfect.
My first love, even before my husband, was teaching. Having it back in my life after a five-year sabbatical, has done wonders for my self-image.
I am not, in any way, advocating for mothers to return to the workforce. Your job at home is infinitely more valuable. But for me, it was time to spread my wings a bit. I have had to sacrifice some freedom, some time with friends, and have gained stress, but it has added some stimulation I needed.
Secondly, I sell things on eBay. This does not really supplement our income, but it is a hobby that makes some money, so I see that as a win. I enjoy sifting through yard sales and thrift stores for interesting finds. I get my shopping fix and it more than pays for itself. Fun! Of course, my kids are old enough that they don't scream and cry in the stores anymore, so that helps make it more enjoyable. And I find some amazing deals for our family too. I have several new with tags items in my closet from a thrift store that I could never have purchased at retail!
Third, I host a Bible study once a week. This is for my girlfriends who want to connect and discuss our Father. It is very comforting to meet every week and study together.
Finally, I am hopping back on this blogging train. I have missed putting myself on "paper" and I am thankful to feel like writing again. Even if no one ever reads these words, at least I have written them.
So this is my life (outside of kids and hubster and home and kitchen and grocery store and doctor's offices.....you get it).
It's not perfect....but it's mine.
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